I read a column last week that compared Lebron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers to the 300 Spartans from the Battle of Thermopylae. So if that is true, King James would be King Leonidas, Kevin Garnett would be Xerxes and Cavs coach Mike Brown would be that council guy who doesn't really control anything, and gets stabbed. (LeBron James is the coach of that team, let's be honest here.) The Cavs - just like the real 300 - were destroyed far away from home. But, instead of holding back an army numbering in the millions, they (meaning LeBron), were holding back a Hall of Fame-force basketball team. History remembers the 300 with reverence, respect and honor, while the Cavs - everyone except LeBron - probably won't. LeBron and the Cavs (what the name of the team should be) deserved to lose to the Celtics. The Celtics are good, but not great. KG isn't what he used to be and Ray Allen is (according to the Sports Guy Bill Simmons) turning the big three into the big two featuring Ray Allen. But the Celtics won the series because, well, they had more than one person doing the scoring. To say that LeBron James carries the Cavs is an understatement. It is the definition of an understatement. It is an understatement so large, I don't have a joke. So how do the Cavs get over the hump? I have a solution. After a length discussion with my roommate Dan Scheaf, during and after Gary Burk's INST 410: Our Place in the Universe, I believe that we figured it out. Obviously, a scoring-big man is out of the question. Zydrunas Ilgauskas isn't getting the job done, but he isn't going anywhere at the same time. Not because he is moves slower than a cement roller and can't jump over the Columbus phone book, he isn't going anywhere because probably no one wants him. The answer lies in an Ohio guy, Michael Redd. He is currently on the Milwaukee Bucks and available for a trade. The Bucks have a new general manager who wants to draft a shooting guard and trade away Redd. Here is how the Cavs are going to get him. They need to trade one of their big men, either "Z" or Big Ben Wallace. I'd trade Wallace because his heart isn't in it. He makes 15.5 million dollars a year (that's 2 million MORE than LeBron), and Kevin Garnett made him look like an undisciplined 10th grader. They also need to trade Daniel "Boobie" Gibson. First off, I hate that nickname. It's inappropriate and just dumb at the same time. Shame on the person who decided that was a good idea. But we're back. Daniel Gibson is not going to help the Cavs win. The Cavs need someone who can score without the ball. Yes, you did read that right. Daniel Gibson doesn't stretch the defense enough. Now for those of you who love Daniel Gibson and are pissed at me, hear me out. ESPN lists Daniel Gibson at a generous 6'2". Michael Redd is 6'6", and in my opinion a better shooter, and he will stretch the defense more because of his height. Defensive players need to be closer to him to contest his shot. Let's review this trade: Daniel Gibson, Ben Wallace, and let's throw in a first round pick and some cash and I think we're even. If that trade happens, I'll stake my claim that the Cavs will make it to the NBA Finals. You heard it here first. With Michael Redd at this side, LeBron James can hold the 'hot gates' against any NBA team. Be it Kobe's Lakers or Tim Duncan's Spurs, LeBron, Redd and hopefully the rest of the Cavs can bring home a championship. Does anyone else think that it's sad that Damon Jones makes $4,172,432 a year? He averaged 6.5 minutes during the Boston series. That's $641,912.62 dollars per minute, or $124,550 per minute he spent on the bench.t&c;
A colorful answer to the Cav's problems
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