I can bet that when you were a senior in high school you couldn’t stop thinking, “College will be so much different from high school.” While part of that is right, I bet the part you thought would be different is actually quite the same, and that part is the stereotypes.
Every school has them, and everyone hates it, but it’s human nature to judge someone whether it be good judgment or bad. Let’s hope you’re on the good side of that judgment but if you’re not, you’ve probably been branded one of the four following stereotypes: the partier, the backstabber, “that” girl, you know the one that always seems to be making a fool of herself. Or “that guy” the notorious guy who has been with every girl and never quite knows when to be quiet.
Earning these labels is easy for most people but what about shaking them? Can someone shake off their label into something good?
It all starts with changing your ways and for the most part changing them for the good. Here are some helpful tips to earning your good name and shaking off that stereotype.
If you’re the partier, it’s a no brainer that you are typically at the biggest party and you’re there all night or until one of your friends carries you home. The partier is someone who is hard to be friends with because all they can talk about is getting drunk and being wild, or they’re drunk whenever you try to talk to them.
My first word of advice to you is cut back on your drinking. Set rules for yourself like only drink twice a week and don’t start until 8 p.m. If you have good will power you should be able to follow your own set of rules, but if you’re not good about it, have a friend help you.
A true friend will watch your back and tell you when you’ve had enough or distract you until your allotted drinking time. Another thing you can do is take up a hobby. Maybe the reason you constantly find yourself drinking and partying is because you have nothing else to do. Exercise, join a club, read a book, study. Do any of these things to get your mind off of drinking.
If you find that drinking takes up most of your thoughts then you may have a problem, in which case I recommend talking to a professional or someone you can trust.
Girls are a common offender of the next stereotype but guys can go there too. It could possibly be the worst stereotype to be and perhaps the hardest one to shake because it’s based around trust. That is the backstabber.
No one likes someone who is two-faced, so if you’re the one who is always “tattling” from one friend to another or saying one thing to someone’s face then turning around and saying the opposite to someone else, this is you.
The advice I have to offer you is simple. Stop. Stop talking about other people, stop spilling secrets and stop being fake. Why be fake when there are plenty of ways to deal with someone you don’t like? If you have to be around someone you don’t like, ignore them. You can be civil or vague but you don’t have to strike up a conversation.
Sooner or later they will get the hint and stop talking to you and if you’re forced to be around this person often and you want to make amends, there is nothing wrong with asking them to lunch or coffee to see if you can settle your differences. If not, the best way to crush someone’s ego is to ignore them. So do just that. I know it’s hard, but in the long run it will save you time, energy and friends.
There are so many ways to earn the title of “that girl.” Most of which are embarrassing and by doing things that you really wish you hadn’t done. From partying too hard and making a fool of yourself to saying something outrageous in front of a bunch of people who won’t let you forget your stupidity.
If you did something while being “that girl,” my first word of advice is to apologize. It doesn’t matter how, but make it genuine and make the attempt to redeem yourself. I know it can be hard to do if people keep bringing it up to you but if that happens then laugh at yourself. Admit that you had one too many or you weren’t yourself, then move on. If it keeps happening, smile and ignore the person saying it. Because chances are they are going to end up being “that girl” or “that guy” sometimes in their four years of college.
There is a reason the title of “that girl” is so easy to earn. That is because everyone messes up. Everyone makes a bad decision that seemed to be a good idea at the time, but totally fell apart. But the key is to remember how you felt the next time you feel like making a decision that has the potential to earn you that name again.
“That guy.” No one likes that guy. That guy is an air head, a jerk or obnoxious as all get out. He doesn’t get that he isn’t nearly as cool or funny as he thinks he is and is often just making a bigger fool of himself with every word he says. That guy can also be a player who is notorious for getting girls and making them tallies instead of relationships.
My advice to you is to change your ways of thinking. Ask yourself why you do and say the things you do. If you can’t pinpoint it, then stop. Make it a point to go out with your friends and be quieter than usual. This will give you insight on what people are talking about when you’re not around and give you a chance to chime in with an opinion that doesn’t revolve around how cool you are or anything about you at all.
Make an effort to expand your thinking into things that really matter. And if you’re a player, why not try actually trying to get to know a girl? It might be tough but be persistent and make your intentions pure.
